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Damon Green's Papers

Companion site to Wattpad 
novel Swedish Fish

Author Iziah Thompson

Use this page to add to the Swedish Fish experience. Throughout the book are bracketed "[]" notes. Each note refers to actual poems, stories and musings byDamon Green.
 
Read through the paper's of Damon Green as his parents do in their search for their missing son. 

December, something, 2013
 
H.U. MAN
 
Lest we be lost in a brave world or in a struggle with the economy of love. May I not give my own soul, or give nothing at all:
 
This dichotomy is deadly.
 
For every beauty in existence, there is a place in my heart. For every afternoon, warm and bountiful, there is a fantasy I covet. There is a type of irony in love. I understand its make but never its mechanism.
 
To be man is to want poison in your veins. To be man is to search for the most venomous snake. To be man is to charm a tiger and love a woman.
-October Green

[P1]

[N2]

May warm evening, 2011
 
My heart's alone I feel And my heart's alone, I feel him
 
A, B, A, B, C, D, D, E, D
You and me we are definitely lost heather Now we're out to face this whether
Hoping, living with honesty and distaste
Guided by a world where excitement is the cost we must be hated
Like the world must be hated for a cost at all cost 
Escaping mediocrity hypocrites commodity Just another member in this rat race getting shit faced Escaping mediocrity, hypocrites getting shit faced Like the world must be hated at all cost Escaping mediocrity, hypocrites getting shit faced
Pain is pleasure  fun Fun and fun is pleasure we'll face this world together The question is whether we will find Rome or Eden I'm just glad I had you Heather.
NOT A DAY
 
You and me we are definitely lost, hoping, living with honesty and distaste
 
Like the world must be hated at all cost, escaping mediocrity, being hypocrites, getting shit faced.
 
Our pain is fun, and fun is pleasure, we will face this world together
The question is whether we will find Rome or Eden, Just glad I had you Heather
-October Green

[P3]

[N4]

brooding Diplodocus humanist reverberates                               forlorn                                     cindery Arcadian polymath God cockalorum maleficent bonnaroo jacquard chortle guffaw boffo awk scofflaw edacity adenoidal breathy brittle glut mercurial acerbically oy-vey vitriol kosher acropolis affectation  acme genesis phobia eureka kudos strident plummy raucous silvery titter giggle snicker yuck appealing breathy croaky grating guttural honeyed matter-of-fact husky gravelly fruity dead flat disembodied quavering tremulous goyish bubbe phobia ethos eyry stentorian smoky orotund
penetrating dogma manifestation dauntless real didgeridoo gnomon Euclid            catechism                   stirabout faints Rosicrucian absolve drapery catacombs sins altar chalice Melbourne rut nourish barley quinoa passerby loom neural mickle ploce chicanery shroud kine oaken Dodgson godhood Khufu uric popover angst aqua fermion karat bugaboo oozy fez menhaden fidgety buff duckpins eider thy kiwi  typhus wooer fungoid euro pouf governable agora leakage rowdyism divergent bogosity disgorge Hmong escargot doer reject rein nullity howdah chukka karaoke filmstrip flywheel ripcord ivied aphid
Skopje effigy adjudge                     pickerel                       barbarism biyearly sotto spigot yipe muskeg bondwoman bhaji Fresno misdoing factoid windburn dogfight inhabitant Sasquatch hafnium bandbox veg exiguity inductive roofgarden poseur unhallowed omnivore dehumidify frigidity hybrid resistivity pushbike deserter kibbitz poppycock unfruitful cockfight breadfruit highjack whiskery cachinnate
feedstuffs makeshift assiduous eisteddfod rephotograph ghoul soggy abrogate agog fugue cagy quahaug egghead Aguirre Kigali sarcophagi ajar Gehenna gynarchy cookhouse                      cybercafe Ezekiel scourge jehad cogwheel coloured chillin hallmark pond-scum dyestuff adjudicatory playact drudgery roe pitapat dodo sud hiatus elasticated pedagogic insignificance ergophobia flowerbed webfoot moi hogwash proviso oik overhang iamb Iaccoca jackknife  hygroscopic pock jag jojoba ubiquitous hahnium awestricken manioc highhanded kaleidoscopic oxbow kapok wigwag extravehicular brouhaha hagiographer eave downpipes rockbound objurgation jerkin harelip pagination biopic                     Jacobite                        Iphigenia  pigpen recon knickerbockers percussionist superconductivity typify ceilidh jape thrift defective cowpox dosh weepie upshot prescriptivist speedster stovepipe nigga corrupt Godsend Yukon fieldworker aeolian fishwives weighbridge overcapitalized fjord infix earwig whew awoken lifework Jivaro  Wovoka QWERTY wigwam cavity  westerlies Guevara sonority insalubrious voluptuary atavistic trove comfit overgraze pud spectrograph menial reawakening westernization euchre furbelow sheikdom                  fecundate                      oddity pone  fecund bolshie vivify brimfull alcove Holocene
September, Something, 2011
 
THE LONGEST QUESTION
 
Pathetic impatience through the shades of liberation, I played instead of faced it
 
Now I see dry Ramen and Brisk Iced Tea, nails dug in my shoulder blades, and kissing standing on tables in the rear view,
 
Words made obstacles only when I was with you
 
Curse superficial dreams and movie scenes, the deepest things inside of me, Maybe not another world or day or May; beauty is beauty and who would throw that away?
-October Green

[P5]

[S6]

One needs a passport to cross the border from Buffalo to Toronto and can hop on a train to Philadelphia, grab one and come back— in one day— for a couple hundred bones. The trip is in two days, so obviously hotel room on Main Street and bus ride each way will set you back about the same amount.
 
Set off with a notebook and pen, clothes and whatever, but make sure to sit up front on the bus so you can watch the road and treeline peel back the whole way. (Results may vary: Instructions for maximum inspiration.) Three friends, the big Canadian city, bring “On the Road” or another Kerouac work or (Insert your favorite John Green book here). Drop your shit off at the dingy hotel. Don't heed the tall innkeepers words, “No party. No loud music.” Take the night, completely drunk, dance, dance, dance, dance, get lost, use the bright CN- Tower as your north star, give money to a homeless man, find a cabbie, preferably Indian, give him too much money, eat a Burrito, fall in love with the a girl in the burrito line, get back to the hotel room, if any straggling tail won't leave, make her cry with a love/AIDS story, and then sleep.
 
The next morning you wake up early and read a little, write a little, all inspired, start drinking with your lads, go to a strip club named Zanzibar while the sun is bright, talk with the strippers, get your first lap dance, let her talk you into another dance, her vagina lips rubbing on your jeans, then another dance, and another, fall in love with the stripper, tell her you can take her away from this life, run! when you don't have enough money to pay them, go get more drunk, go to a club, dance, dance, dance, dance, kiss, fall in love with a girl (or guy) who goes to Ryerson, never see her again, stumble, lackered, back to the hotel room, get kicked out of the hotel room for smoking pot with the girls next door, sleep at the bus terminal with empty pockets. Go home.

[P7]

LIA'S HAIKU 
 
GOING TO FUCK DRAKE.
 
SEE IF YOU CAN STOP ME, D.
 
I THINK I LOVE YOU.
 
 
 
So prove you love me

[S8]

BigDaddy...    
     Where are you right now?
 
Emily...    
     In the classroom...
 
BigDaddy...
     ooh sexy. Anyone around?
 
Emily...    
    nope, by myself :p
 
BigDaddy...    
     Check this out.                      http//www.pornrub.com/redhedrailling/athletic/outdoors/nubiles/watch/4889302 ...this is what I'm going to do to you later...
 
Emily...    
     So horny OMG

[P9]

Rainy October day, 2011
 
THE AMERICAN EXPERIENCE
 
I want that jacket so bad it hurts like
It should be mine; why not?
I need it; I want that jacket.
I won't be passive, but brave like; Who cares about danger that's why we have graves.
Time passes as days and everyone around me is dull
Except me I'm just lost.
Sitcom, gym, school, do it all over again like; that man in a suit is stuffy
She is a twit
I have money to spend.
I hate this and you like; I hate that, oh I hate this, but I want that jacket now
It informs my visions,
What I want right now is crucial to my existence
-October Green

[P9]

December something, 2014
 
LIA AMBROSIA
 
How quickly the night burst, and its flame maintained for us.
 
Nothing stays gold or green, but we needed not rings, they're dust.
 
Love cost comfort, but living, it makes skies and eyes lose sorrow;
we were perfect for love, made of gush, thrown in lust.
 
No need now to think about qualms of tomorrow.
-October Green

[P11]

March, in heaven's time, 2014
 
PASSING TIME
You ever just lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
lay in the grass
equality
    As the earth's hairs surround you.
The earth's energy runs through you.
The sun’s heat meets the earth's energy in battle.
    I walk away and return;
my head my shoulders my body leave depressions in the grass.
My place on this earth next to you...
                               -October Green
 

[P12]

Woman
 
I don't want you to save me. I don't even need you.
 
Flesh and neurons, neurotic living, you heroine, you pull me metaphysically and spiritually.
 
 My pale god, my ass freckled queen, everything asks for an adjective for you. Too hateful, lackadaisical, but I only want verbs when I’m with you.
 
You’re a murderous beauty, the scariest woman I’ve ever seen. You live and breathe like you're dead already . You spit on sacred things.
 
 The only truth. The loneliness. Youth. Body. Animal. Cannibal. I want to raw you. And that's passion.
 
 Yeah, we are weak together— in ungodly satisfaction.
 
-October Green

[P13]

Dear October,
 
I always detested those fanciful stories of love. I thought that there was nothing more ridiculous than the thought that a human is not moved by anything other than the skin deep colors and contours. That there is no soul, no fate, and nice guys always finish last. I didn’t believe in true love. or true anything— especially love. The obsessive drudgery of a sad sack, or the repulsive pretentiousness of a voluble strumpet and prepubescent smugness that reassures that which legitimizes it: an inflamed ego. A bunch of cunts if you ask me. Makes me sick to think about. They can suck my clit.
 
There are only a number of anatomical positions for humans to take on life and they all involve realism and a humble light that only comes from a fair mix of existentialism and scientific observation. We are all liars, and those who are not are barbarians (You taught me that). For the clarity of passion, for the economy of human emotion, I plead, save yourself from the fever.
But on the other hand, D, you may have chiseled the slightest chink in my cynical armor. I’m sorry I fell for you and I’’m sorry you fell for me. But a crazy bitch and a closed off bird don’t make the best couple.
 
Keep making love and drinking on cool nights. Expect from every human what you do from yourself: nothing. The pressures of society are a festering slag of emaciated waste. Bubbling, choking, and feeding evil as ignorance. You can be above it my love, because as beings we substantiate every morsel of our own farce. We did try. Goodbye. I love you.
 
-a wench